I'll be strong
by dawn's guardian
Summary: They don't know if his babysister will make it, Yugi doesn't know if he'll make it... Who do you call when everyone's grieving? How can you be strong when all you want to do is cry? He'll be strong, no matter the cost. will include cutting.


Disclaimer: If you think I own Yu-Gi-Oh, I don't know what you are doing here, you are obviously too stupid to read and should be contained for your own safety.

A/N: Ok, I'm taking my cue from a close friend of mine writing down what happened to me a couple of years ago

(you know who you are, Mel, thank you for giving me the guts to do this)Will be rather dark and at times very depressing, but I'm hoping for some kind of catharsis, so bear with me… It is my sincere hope that this story may help those who cut see that they are not alone and those who do not understand that cutters aren't freaks.

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It's a dark and dreary night, the rain is splattering across the streets. In the kame game shop a lone figure sits in front of the window. Weary purple eyes stare at the raindrops falling from the skies. There was a time, not so long ago when the sight would've made him happy, there was a time when he had been happy.

The boy presses his forehead against the window, hoping to find some relieve from the almost permanent headache that has been plaguing him for some time now as dark thoughts relentlessly attack his mind.

Laïs, that's her name, the name of the little girl lying almost motionless in the hospital, his sister. And as he closes his eyes he remembers, he remembers how happy he'd been when his parents told him he was going to be a big brother, he remembers the excitement of watching the first echoes, of finding out it was going to be a she, he remembers the absolute terror of that night, when his little one was born precisely three months early. The doctors still don't know if she is going to make it…

He grabs his pillow, stuffs it in his mouth and screams in frustration. There is nothing he can do, only wait and it's slowly driving him insane…

From the door opening a pair of crimson eyes rest upon the frail figure. It was four in the morning, his hikari should've been sleeping by now, but Yuugi had not been resting well since the birth of his little sister. The yami worries about the health of his aibou, he has obviously lost weight and the bags under his eyes grow more pronounced with each day.

He restrains the urge to punch the wall and turns around with one last sad look upon his light. There was nothing he could do, only wait.

He hates waiting…

Yugi throws away the pillow and angrily wipes his eyes. Crying wouldn't help, crying never helps. He just didn't know what to feel. The first time he'd seen the girl he'd fallen in love with her and that scared him so much he could barely breathe. What if she didn't make it? It would be easier to distance himself now, right? Only he found that he couldn't, Laïs had already wormed her way into his heart. He couldn't loose her, he just couldn't!

He pushes himself away from the window and stands up. Flicking on the light he stumbles towards the bathroom and splashes some water onto his face. A tired and pale child stares back at him from behind the mirror. It's strange, how much his appearance had changed in a few weeks. Gone was the happy, careless young boy that he used to be, in his place stood some kind of weird cross between a junky and a vampire. He frowns at the tear tracks visible on his face. He couldn't afford to be weak anymore. He was the eldest, he had to be strong. For his parents, for his sister… They had enough on their plates already, he could take care of himself.

Yes, he would be strong.

Yami's sitting on the edge of his bed. He doesn't notice the tears falling from his eyes, doesn't care about the shivers coursing through his body. His hikari is I pain, that much is obvious even without the mind link they once shared. He could see it in the lifeless eyes, in the fake smiles and the listless tone of his voice. He gets up and starts pacing, desperate for anything that will allow him to ease his light's pain, only there's nothing. There are no words to makes this right, there is no foolproof strategy that will save the day. He can't save the damsel in distress, this time the damsel has to save herself… And he's scared that if she fails his Yugi will fail with her. He cannot loose his light, doing so would surely destroy him!

And so he sits and prays to whatever gods may be listening. Hey prays for mercy, for the life of a little girl lying in the hospital, for the carefree and pure soul of his aibou and for the survival of his own heart.

Miles away in the intensive care unit of domino hospital a couple clings to each other. They stand a silent vigil over a small bed which carries an even smaller baby. The young girl is hooked up on so many wires it's hard to tell where the baby ends and the machine begins. She doesn't know the people standing around her are her parents, doesn't realise how much they love her, she can't know about the brother that is lying on his bed, trying in vain to sleep or the guardian that worries about both him and her in the other room.

But still she fights, against all odds, for a chance to live, a chance to be happy.

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A/N: short, isn't it? Hopefully chapters will get longer in the future, but I make no promises… Now go and review, you know you want to ;-)


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